Thursday, 27 December 2007

Foreigner Blues

Dear Mr. Editor

A few weeks back I read about how crimes by foreigners are on the increase. We will ignore how crime by foreigners are more likely to be reported and how the actual number of foreigners have increased which, obviously, will increase the number of crimes as well. We will also ignore any other statistics that are made invalid by stupidity.

What I would like to comment on it the "photograph" of the alleged foreigners in you on-line article. For your convenience I include the "photograph" in this letter.




I must admit, were I that girl, I'd also be freaked out if a blue man came stumbling my way. However, apart from that I just don't see anything to be scared of.

Just look at these three "foreigners". They are clearly in a really bad state. I suspect the gentleman with the barrette is a struggling artist. He doesn't even seem to have enough money to buy razor blades for a decent shave. The gentleman in the middle has obviously been the victim of some kind of crime. He was probably assaulted by a Korean, the crime not reported, of course.

Let's look at the guy on the right. He's BLUE! That's enough reason for him to be down, wouldn't you agree? I suspect he might have bad eyesight as well because he looks like he walked in to a lamp pole or something of the sort. These men are more dangerous to themselves that to anyone around them

Further evidence of their bad state, if you need it, are the toothpicks they're carrying. From that and the fact that they have to support each other we can deduce that they obviously just left a restaurant where they had too much Soju, in an attempt to drown their sorrows.

Truthfully I tell thee, we foreigners have a really hard time here in Korea.

Kind Regards
Otto Silver



p.s.

I also doubt the authenticity of this "photograph" when looking at the little girl. I admit that she has a possible East Asian haircut, a small nose and small mouth, but Koreans don't have eyes that round. Surely you could have found a better model for your obviously fake photograph.

*Please note that statements in this Blog are not intended to make anyone look bad. I do not look down on Koreans. I'm merely describing how amusing I sometimes find people and I am mostly describing it to other Westerners. Feel free to come to South Africa and tell the world how crazy we are because heaven knows, we are.

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